Letters to Young Black Women by Daniel Whyte is one of the most insightful books I have read for young women. I am a motivational speaker and I am always trying to find great material to share with others and great material to learn from and this at the top of my list for women. Below are some sentences that highlighted in the book that I wanted to share with others. My earlier blog post of this book focused on two of the letters that dealt with men and the few highlights below cover a few more letters from the book
- “what troubles me the most is that more young black women today are allowing themselves to be used, mistreated, and hurt by men who do not care anything for them” Daniel Whyte
ON YOUR LIFE — Educational ON THE IMPORTANCE OF YOUR EARLY EDUCATION Letter Twelve
- The value of getting a good education is all around us.
- First, you must have an internal motivation to want to learn. You must have a desire to learn. No one can put that in you.
- It’s a made up mind that says: “I want to learn.
- Second, you must take responsibility for your learning. Your teachers can teach until they are blue in the face, and your parents can fuss at you about taking your schooling seriously, but your education will not be to you what it should be until you take full responsibility for it.
ON SETTING EDUCATIONAL GOALS Letter Thirteen
- Over the years, I have learned that if you do not set goals, you will not accomplish anything. In this letter I want to encourage you to set solid educational goals. What I mean by setting educational goals is this: you have to look at where you are now and map out where you would like to be in the next four, ten or twenty years. Write your goals down, pray over them, and ask God to lead, guide, and direct you as you work toward those goals.
- No matter what grade you’re in, I want you to start setting your educational goals right now. Take a pen and paper, and write down exactly what you would like to be doing at the age of twenty-five. Now, write down exactly what courses need to be taken to reach that goal. After you have written those courses down, pursue your educational goals like a woman on a mission, and don’t let anything or anybody stand in your way.
- “Goals are dreams with deadlines.” —Diana Hunt
ON GETTING YOUR DOCTORATE DEGREE BEFORE MARRIAGE Letter Fourteen
- Get your Doctorate Degree in some field that you love and in which you are especially gifted before you marry,
- Here are some of the benefits for you if you follow this suggestion: 1. You can concentrate on and focus on your studies without distraction. (By the way, if possible, I would encourage you to not even work a job while in college.) 2. If you are pursuing a Doctorate Degree in a certain field, you will be running with bright and wise people — those who are going in the same direction as you are. God may very well have you to meet someone special in that group. Even if you don’t meet that special someone, you will meet many good people, and make friends that will last a lifetime. 3. You will grow so much in that strange period between the ages of 17 and 25 or 26, and the gaining of a good, solid, strong education will only enhance that period and certainly the rest of your life. 4. As a female, if you choose to have a career, I believe having a Doctorate in your field gives you more options, and will allow you to obtain a good paying job that will let you have more control over your schedule and the environment in which you work. In other words, you won’t have to take jobs that would be distasteful to you, or that would compromise the principles by which you live.
THE MARKS OF A TRULY EDUCATED WOMAN Letter Fifteen
- An educated woman knows how to think like a man when she needs to, and at the same time be all woman.
- An educated woman is discerning enough to say “no” to a man who doesn’t mean her any good.
THE POWER OF READING Letter Sixteen
- Why you should read: • Reading helps you to think (as opposed to the television which dulls your mind). • Reading helps you to write and speak better. • Reading increases your vocabulary. • Reading takes you places mentally that you may never be able to go physically. • Reading helps you to become a more educated person.
ON NOT BEING A SILLY-MINDED WOMAN Letter Twenty-Four
- She [a silly woman] is a woman who is not guided by absolutes, moral principles, or facts; rather, she is guided by her emotions and feelings only.
- She [a silly woman] doesn’t keep her guard up in life. Therefore, she is constantly bombarded by people and things that keep her from fulfilling God’s purpose for her life.
ON REMAINING A VIRGIN UNTIL YOU ARE MARRIED Letter Twenty-Five
- when a young lady loses her virginity before marriage, she loses something very valuable.
- Sister, the world will tell you differently. It will tell you that it is okay to try other men out before you settle down.
- to have sex before marriage: 1. It will cost you more than it will cost him. I know it’s not fair, but it is true.
- To be honest, for many men taking a woman’s virginity and leaving her heartbroken is just a game of cat and mouse. Too many women have learned this the hard way.
- There is nothing like your self-respect. Ladies, when you respect yourself you must demand others to do the same. Never let anyone encourage you to do something that you’re not comfortable doing. If your significant other truly cares for you, then he will respect your wishes. And if he chooses not to wait, then you know that he is not the man that God has for you.
- Do not open your heart to every man